Saturday, February 9, 2008

Lord show me humility

Hey everyone. It is great to be back. 5 months in Iraq was definitely interesting to say the least. The nights were long and the days were longer. At times I would kill to be home with my family, but other times I would be filled with an immense sense of pride for what I was doing there. While I was over there God really worked on me. He has really been teaching me about being transparant and He is slowly teaching me to be humble. When your living for yourself, and you finally realize exactly what you've become, and how sometimes your really not much different then how you were before you became a christian. Well when you finally realize that, it hurts. Bad.

I've reached a point in my walk where I just want to live a quiet simple life (with loud Christian Rock music of course:) ) and love people like Jesus would. I dont want to start fights or debates or anything anymore. Will I stop sticking up for the truth? No. But with all the debating ive done most of the time the goal of it was for me to win. It was/is a huge pride issue. I've learned in the past couple months that I really desire to be a lot less selfish. To think about others before me. I have such an incredible wife and amazing kids who deserve to have a father who is there for them and leads them. A father who loves them and husband who has time for his Wife. That is what they deserve and sadly enough Im not always that guy for them. Like I said it hurts. But God is changing me. He really is working on my heart, one small part at a time.

You know it really all seems so simple, to not be selfish, or prideful. But our human nature tells us we need to live this way and like I said, sometimes we dont realize how selfish we truly are being. Maybe I'm alone here. Could be.


One of the songs that helped me out a lot is a song called Promise of a Lifetime. I encourage you to look it up on youtube. Its by kutless by the way. It is incredible that when you are going through parts of your life God does those little (sometimes big) things to let you know he's there, and loves you and is there for you. Here are the lyrics to the song.

I have fallen to my knees
As I sing a lullaby of pain
I’m feeling broken in my melody
As I sing to help the tears go away
Then I remember the pledge you made to me

I know you’re always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I’m clinging to The promise of a lifetime
I hear the words you say
To never walk away from me and leave behind The promise of a lifetime

Will you help me fall apart
Pick me up, take me in your arms
Find my way back from the storm
And you show me how to grow through the change
I still remember the pledge you made to me

I know you’re always there
To hear my every prayer inside
I’m clinging to The promise of a lifetime
I hear the words you say
To never walk away from me and leave behind The promise of a lifetime


I am holding on to the hope I have inside
With you I will stay through every day
Putting my understanding aside I am comforted

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Take it easy everyone and have a goodnight and i apologize for just throwing out all my issues like that... just was on my heart to post that for some reason...

In Christ,


-Robert

1 comment:

MamaK said...

The truth can be defended quietly and simply. It can be a bright shining light coming from a humble vessel. In fact, the less the vessel attracts (pride vs. humility), the more the light is the focus.

Great post, Robert.